Summer 2010 in Waco

Hello world.

My last update was very brief. Mainly because at that point in time , I only knew the fact and not truly how I felt about said fact.

The best way I can think to describe how I feel is summed up in a song by The Script.



(I know this is a song about a romantic relationship, but it truly describes how I feel about my friendship with Kim minus any of the romantic connotations)

I feel betrayed by the person I trusted most. I had never known friendship like this before. Someone I could share with openly about all the craziness in my head... and would share with me her craziness. but also, Kim is just incredible to hang out with. You are always having fun with her. She was truly my best friend bar none. And then she started dating the guy I had openly shared with her about having a crush on for the past year. She even knew when I was lying about being over him.

I kept denying to myself that I was mad at her, and I turned that hatred and anger in towards myself. It began to eat me alive, and is still doing so. I am in fact "barely breathing."

I'm wounded. I am a butterfly that has been beaten repeatedly with a baseball bat.

*****

On a lighter note...

I started my job on June 1st. It isn't as stressful as I thought it would be. I like it. Sawyer and Jimmy are cute.

My apartment is coming together, though I'll wait to share pictures when it is completely done.

Summer in Waco is lame. Can't wait for school to start. Then I will at least feel normal.